Ok, so “fat” isn’t the politically correct term, but I’ve been there so I can use it.
Something happened this past week and it made me step back and think. My poor husband was the one who put it “out” there, but don’t think I’m blaming him.
What will it take or what size will I need to be for people to stop treating me like a fat person? Or maybe it is my perception.
For example, when I go to friend’s homes for a meal I usually hear, “I was wondering if you could eat this food.” I know they are being considerate of my efforts to change my lifestyle, but it still stings. Does that make sense?
My little family was headed to the stockyards to sell some cows and I picked up a candy bar for me and my Princess to split. My husband said, “When did you start eating that?” I immediately felt judged (though I’m sure that was the furthest thing from his mind) and I felt the need to defend my choice of eating half of a candy bar.
I have told him from the beginning that I have eaten chocolate. It just felt like a stab. I immediately envisioned the lady in this picture.
Today in church he asked me if I was still losing weight or maintaining. What is wrong with me? Why does that make me feel so fat? Isn’t it crazy? I’m sure satan is just doing a number on me today, but what does it take for someone to be considered a person set free from food bondage?
Some of you know that I’ve been reading a book entitled the Diet Alternative by Diane Hampton. If you missed the post about this awesome book, just click HERE. I haven’t finished this book yet, but today I picked it up and began to read Chapter 6 TRANSFORMED BY NEW THOUGHTS. Diane pointed out the power of our words and our confession over ourselves. She gave the example of Jesus cursing the fig tree and said, “Some people have been cursing their fig trees with regard to their weight for many years” (page 113). How many of us have said, “I can’t lose weight. I came from an overweight family. I guess I will always be fat. I can look at food and gain weight.” She reminded me that Proverbs 13:2 declares, “A man shall eat well by the fruit of his mouth.” Proverbs 18:20 states, “A man’s stomach shall be satisfied from the fruit of his mouth.” Ouch. Don’t I know it! I have spoken more negative things over my weight than positive — that is for sure. THIS WILL CHANGE IN JESUS’ NAME.
Proverbs 27:7
A satisfied soul loathes the honeycomb.
Diane pointed out that IF our soul was full and satisfied, even a honeycomb (or chocolate bar, etc …) wouldn’t be tempting. Thought provoking isn’t it? She said this proverb also warns, “To a hungry soul every bitter thing is sweet.” (In my language, it means I would even eat dark chocolate — though I don’t like it.)
So, this has me pondering about the hunger in my own soul.
Here are some examples Diane gave to FILL our souls:
Instead of saying, “I can’t seem to lose weight” say “I lose weight easily.” Instead of saying, “I have been overweight all my life,” say, “I am being changed by the power of God.”
More examples to confess:
“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” (Philippians 4:13). I can lose weight and control my eating for the rest of my life through Christ.
My appetite is being totally changed through Jesus my Lord. Jesus “Himself bore [my] sins in His own body … that [I] … might live for righteousness” (1 Peter 2:24) and be dead to every form of bondage.
I receive Jesus in my eating, so I receive “power to [fill in the blank] of God” (John 1:12).
I will soon wear a size ___ dress or suit.
I will weigh ___ pounds because I can lose weight easily now.
Diane suggested that we apply scriptures to our area of bondage — in this case, weight.
Chapter 7 EAT WHATEVER IS SET BEFORE YOU
This chapter really has me checking my heart. To someone in bondage, a candy bar brings condemnation, guilt, judgment … Diane stated that when people have been on many diets, they are likely to make food choices that are influenced by a long list of “rights” and “wrongs.”
Didn’t Jesus say that all food was good and that we should not worry about our life, what we will eat or what we will drink? (Matt. 6:25)
So here I am. Searching my heart to see why my husband’s words had such an impact on me. Seeking to find final freedom and deliverance in this area — but also wanting to see myself as others see me (especially as God sees me).
Blech. Just working through my thoughts with you …
I’ll keep you posted as my heart is enlightened in this area.
I totally understand sis, love you.
I'm coming back later to continue to read it again…I SO need to get that book girl..it is SO amazing. All those proverbs you have shared,,UNDERLINED girl in all my Bibles..oh ya,,,the power of our words…
Didn't Jesus say that all food was good and that we should not worry about our life, what we will eat or what we will drink? (Matt. 6:25)
amen….yes…Oh sweet sis,,He is bringing you deeper….Bringing you to a place to get rid of all the yuck that has been associated with what food represented to you in a way that was not glorifying Him nor His precious temple that is you…
((hugs))
Loved the scriptures you shared and covered us with..
When you get old the doctor tries to take over your life and be your food dictator.
I say, when your young eat what ever you want to, but do it in moderation.
100 years from now nobody will care about what you ate or didn't eat
It's never easy. But I know that you are discovering that road towards success. His! He is faithful to lead you in this journey. I appreciate it when you are always honest about what you think [or say]. Because I know many are being encouraged at the same time, if facing the same battles. "We wrestle not against humans"…so praying that the mouth is still covered with the Armor as you eat anything! Spiritually and physically speaking. God bless you sister.
My husband refuses to say anything about my weight. That is very hard for me, because I have a hard time with seeing myself as overweight. I've tried explaining to him that I NEED him to be honest with me about this, I crave his support to do this. *sigh* I'm gonna go check out the book you recommend. I know that I need to turn my eyes towards Christ for my success. Just so hard when food is so yummy :oP
THANK YOU! I get it! and I needed to read this post.
Hugs,
andrea
i have the same issue. ty for making me feel not alone in this.
Beth, I get what you're saying, but I have to say, you look REALLY thin in that top photo to me. I guess you have to decide how much is enough to lose. I think when it's such a big thing in your life, others pay more attention to it. One of my neighbors asked me once, prior to our having Ashley, why we didn't have kids. I told her we wanted to save enough money so that I could stay home and not have to work. She said, 'how much is enough?' I hadn't really thought of it that way. In other words, do you ever really get there? It's my experience that once you've been overweight, it's hard to ever lose the feeling that you no longer are, no matter what you weigh, which I guess is what you're dealing with in this post. How do you get your head to where your body is? I think you look great & for one, I hope you enjoyed that half of a candy bar! :O) I'm sure 'Boaz' meant nothing by it. Don't let it sting, just tell him to go sell his cows & leave you alone! LOL!
Congratulations you won the Little House Musical giveaway on my blog! Random Generator chose number 1! 🙂 Hope you and Princess enjoy!
BTW, you look gorgeous! Hope you see the remarkable changes. Who cares what people say. You know it – you have lost it and you look great! God Bless.
I am literraly fixing to post a post on a situation that happened with me and hurtful words. What God has done, is brought me to your blog first ~ and if you don't mind I am gonna link this post in mine. Thank you for your beautiful words, and sharing HIS beautiful words as well.
I often feel the same way you do. But I do believe that it is us and our self-conscious mind!
Beth you will make it because you have the will to succeed inyour persuit to lose wait, but God said in his time not ours! Remember that!
Love this post!
GOOD STUFF! Thank you! I'll have to check out that book!
I'm beginning to understand just how many women struggle with this issue. And just how many men struggle with it in secret. Your oppenness is helping so many people, Beth.
I understand much of what you are saying Beth. I'm 80 pounds down on my journey with overeating and still have more I'd like to shed from my frame.
I so agree that words hold so much power. I have found that in my own journey words I remember spoken over me as a child were a curse. I was living out what was spoken over me. In The Name of Jesus – no longer! I have not heard of the Diet Alternative book. There is power in the Name of Jesus! Amen!
Blessings to you as you journey on and find satisfaction in Him! I've found sweet encouragement here today.
You have come a long way girl!
Way to go!
I think you are so beautiful…..inside and out, Beth. I think we all face these struggles whether it is with food/weight, anxiety, control, etc.
Thankfully we are serving a God who will give us the strength needed to see victory!
Well, you look fablous! And not only are you a beautiful woman on the outside, you are a beautiful woman of God on the inside.
You are a blessing!
What a great post. I think we are all in bondage to something, and we are tender in that area. I am a perfectionist, so critism stings me extra hard. Yet, I am a treasure in the arms of Christ, and he loved me while I am still a sinner. Grace, grace, grace! He has it for us. We need to have it for ourselves!
🙂
Hi Beth…I think I have to reintroduce myself…I used to follow your blog a bit but just lost touch somehow! In any case, your face keeps popping up on so many other blogs that I follow so I hopped back over and remember that I had found you before. Now I know why! God led me to this post of yours today and am I ever glad that He did.
I have been obese for a great part of my adult life (I'm 38 now) and have 100+ pounds to lose. This won't start until after the birth of our child in May but I am looking forward to all God will do within me along this journey. These scriptures and the book you have referenced are all incredible. I will have to check the book out for sure!
May God continue to bless you as you sort out all that He has given you to sort through. He is definitely working in you and you will be blessed for it.
I will definitely be back now that I've found you again!
God bless you!
Great post!!!! I think we've all been there all been there. At least all of us dieters.
I'm still reading mine, and my friend at church also recommended another book she has. She said now she is released from the bondage of food! Amazing! I'll have to find out what the book is called and let you know.
Beth, you are doing a wonderful job. I commend you highly!!
Want to thank you for your encouraging comments on my blog. I did not know Jennie Lee Riddle wrote Revelation Song. I thought Kari did. I am out of the loop. Blessings to you dear.
I have told you before that you look great. You are really being to hard on yourself. You are beautiful. YOu must stop thinking that food has a hold on you because obviously it does not. Look at where you were and where you are. You are taking such care & exercising your temple.
Do not let words sting because if you ask me…you have been set free.
Hugs,
Mimi
Weight is such a touchy subject. I really need to lose about 30 pounds. I would settle for 20. I know I am overweight but I do not feel like a fat person. I think it is because when I was a teenager I was skinny skinny skinny; I hated the word and I hated being that way. I think I learned to think like a thin person. So now when I look in the mirror, I know I need to lose weight. I think I need to stay away from mirrors. lol
Hugs,
Charlotte