Ok, just by telling men not to read, I have probably attracted them like bees to honey, sigh!
I thought I’d give you women a good giggle.
First, let me say that NOBODY calls before they come to our house. We live on a farm right on a busy road — so people just POP IN! Seriously, I think I’d faint if someone actually came by and didn’t catch me in my robe or worse — like today!
Second, I have bragged to some of my friends about a new product I discovered by Sally Hansen. It is like “Nair” (you know the stuff that eats the hair off of your legs?) for your facial hair.
Third, in case MEN are disobeying my wishes and are reading … most women after 30 begin to get some facial hair — not like you where it grows out of your ears and nose (ha), but on our face.
Fortunately for me, my hair is very light blond (whew), but I still can’t stand it so I attack it immediately!
Now — you can only imagine where I am going with this.
Here I was, minding my own business. I made up my bed and pulled all of my hair back so I wouldn’t get this stinky solution anywhere it shouldn’t be … still wearing my PJ’s because who would get a shower first?!?!?!
I cover my lower face and lip in this white solution and I hear, “DING DONG!” No, nobody called me that, it was my DOORBELL! Oh crap! Yes, I said crap! I ran to the back door and I saw a vehicle I didn’t recognize. I slowly backed away and thought, “Nope, it ain’t happening! I will NOT go to the door or be seen.” As I ran to the front of the house to pull down my bedroom shade and hide out, the lady saw me! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!! She had also run to my front door. DANG, DANG, DANG! I was caught and it was someone I knew (more like an acquaintance) so I HAD TO GO TO THE DOOR. Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
There I stood in all of my glory. I had on a white creamy beard with my PJs. Things weren’t located where they normally would be if I were dressed — if you know what I mean. Ohhhhh, for cryin’ in the rain. Why don’t people call!?!?!?
So there you have it. A good giggle at my expense. Oh, I forgot to mention that in my panic I at least pulled my hair down. Guess what happened? It landed in the solution that is supposed to DISSOLVE HAIR!!!! Oh for cryin’ in the rain! I didn’t realize it until she left. Hopefully I wiped it off in time.
Hy.ster.i.cal!!! 🙂
Woo Hoo, I am rolling on the floor here. I love you, thanks for making me laugh.
I think I just tinkled in my britches! Oh, was that ever funny!
Oh the joys of being loved by so many! LOL Thanks for the laugh.
Funny!!!!!!!
I don't want to laugh, but it is SO required right now. 🙂
It's hard when I just swallowed 2 cups of coffee and just reading this made me crack up so much…Excuse me for a minute….
That was a good one! Well, if ever you found out that some of your hair was wiped out when they were not supposed to, I think this is where Minoxidil might be of help 🙂
Thank you for the good laugh. I need it today. God bless you sister.
Bwahahahahaha!Oh, that is a hoot! Sorry to be laughin' at your expense, but this is just too funny…are you SURE we aren't related? This sounds like something that would happen to me! LOL
Hope the rest of your day goes better! 😉
Love,
Beth
That was hilarious, and I am with you I hate when people come over unexpected. Thank God my last surprise visit the house was picked up….I thank God for little blessings like that.
Beth, I can just picture you! I may need to check out that product. Mine is blonde too but it gets worse as you get older. I hate to tell you that. I hope the lady had a good laugh WITH YOU and not at you. LOL.
Oh my goodness. I am laughing so hard. what a morning!!!!
That would so be my luck! You are hilarious!
Oh that is just hilarious……thanks for making me laugh! I def. needed that today!
I am so like you…..People have seen way more than they should with me…..I am sure I have scarred many.
As far as the "stache"….I work part-time in a salon so I am constantly waxing that badboy right off. It works great and you only have to do it every 4-6 weeks….or when your daughter points out the hair loudly in public.
just.sayin'
LOVE THIS!
xox
Oh my gosh….I hope you did take it off in time!
This post was so funny! Ugh..I normally don't mind if someone comes over unexpectedly, but it also depends who it is too..know what I mean??
But, it is hard to ignore the doorbell or knock when my puppy is barking and my kids are all running to the door!!!!
first time to your blog and I just had to say hello..and this post is so funny of course because it didnt happen to ME!!! Because that would so be my luck!!!!
Dear Beth what you women go through but poor hubby get's it in the neck when the wife looks at him and say to him does this dress look good on me hubby, Hubby, very nice dear.wife,WHAT, only nice.Well love, you are not 21 anymore.HUBBY you should dress for you age.World war3 starts.Hubby is just telling the true. Men run to the hills. you can't win for telling the truth.
Hahahaha! I wish I'd been the gal behind the door. I would have laughed and hugged you (hopefully without getting any nasty hair-eating stuff in my hair).
One time I was wearing my wornout sweat pants (with a hole in the bottom) and a tshirt (exercise clothes, lol!) and my hair needed a good washing so I had tossed it up in a very messy pony tail. No makeup.
So I went out into the front to take the garbage out and there were my neighbors (who also went to our church).
He had brought his brother with him over to our house to "meet the pastor and his wife."
Oh my goodness! I was a mess!
LOL! Too funny! I am in a constant state of 'please don't come to my door'! Since I've been sick, I have not felt well enough to 'get ready' so I constantly have my hair pulled up, I wear my husband's comfy boxers, no bra and I use my glasses instead of fooling with my contacts. Plus, I do good to shave my legs every couple of weeks or so. *sigh* I just can't stand up long enough to get anything much done to myself. I hate it, but that's how it is when you are basically bedridden. I dread to hear that *ding-dong* or knock at the door. I guess the one good thing about it is if anybody were to break in, I would scare them right back out the door! :0) LOL!
Thanks for stopping by my blog today. It truly makes my day to make a new bloggy friend!
Hope your day is spectacular!
Many blessings,
Teresa <><
http://toomanyheartbeats.blogspot.com/
I never open the door for anybody. I tell my neighbors if you want to see me, you'd better call before coming. One day, I was halfway dressed and the mail lady brought a certified letter and I knew it was something important so I answered it and felt like a dum dum for doing it. I think you should have posted a picture of yourself….just like the acquaintance got to experience.
bless your heart…all I can say is she deserved whatever she got.
She should have called before she came, especially if she's an acquaintance.
I would not have been so kind. She would have been left standing at an unanswered door.
How's your hair?
So funny! I love how brave you are to post this.
Isn't is lovely to be a woman of a certain age?
Oh my goodness!!!! lol with you not at you 🙂
Oh dear!!! But hey, sounds like something I need to try… Nair that is! 🙂
They should make you a spokesperson. 🙂
Blessings-
Amanda
That is just too funny! I can't tell you how many times I have "pretended" to not be home. I'm not crazy about unannounced visitors.
Beth,
That is a perfect picture to go along with your FUNNY sad story.
♥Hope
LOL! Sorry, that is too funny. Yeah, I have the same prob. I live next door to my inlaws on the farm, and I NEVER know when my dear MIL will pop in. I get dressed the second I wake up now.
That was just too funny. DOn't think I could have actually answered the door though.
OH how funny! Great story, Beth!
You had me laughing at the 'mental image' you gave us!
O.K. so after I stopped laughing I have to tell you. I was in a store bathroom today and they had just the right lighting and guess what I saw! You guessed it, hair I can't see in the lighting at home. You have to tell me what the stuff is that you had slathered all over your face!
I deal with my blonde hair too. This was funny!
Oh no, how crazy!