Today’s discussion at the Internet Cafe is about insecurity. Kim asked us the following questions:
First of all, do you struggle with “Insecurity” issues?
If no, why not?
If yes, can you tell of a specific situation that happened to you that brought out your insecurities (the more details, the better).
Again, if you do struggle with insecurity, what do you believe is the root cause of your insecurity?
Results
1. 1 not confident or sure : uncertain – feeling somewhat insecure of his reception
2. 2 not adequately guarded or sustained : unsafe – an insecure investment
3. 3 not firmly fastened or fixed : shaky – the hinge is loose and insecure
4 a. 4 a not highly stable or well-adjusted – an insecure marriage b. b deficient in assurance : beset by fear and anxiety – always felt insecure in a group of strangers
Related Forms
1. in·se·cure·ly adverb
2. in·se·cure·ness noun
3. in·se·cu·ri·ty+in-si-!ky2r-u-tE -ˈkyu̇r-ə-tē noun
Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary copyright © 2008 by Merriam-Webster, incorporated
Do I struggle with insecurity issues? As I question my heart about this, I immediately think about the definition “beset by fear and anxiety.” As you know from my previous Cafe Chat posts, I have battled great fears in my life and have overcome some major strongholds. But I would be lying if I didn’t admit to still having some insecurities.
Can you tell of a specific situation that happened to you that brought out your insecurities? I don’t know if there was one specific incident that pushed me in that direction, but one situation just came to mind. When I started school (1st grade) I had to ride a bus with high school students. We lived 20 miles from school, and 20 miles at 40 mph … was a LONG ride! I stepped on the bus at 6:30am and arrived at school at 8am. I can remember getting on the school bus, innocent, scared, knowing NOBODY at all!
After my first day of school, as I got OFF of the bus, I felt a bunch of hands grabbing at my bottom as I ran past them. The older guys were feeling of me and there was NOTHING I could do. There was nobody there to protect a little girl. I endured a lot of emotional abuse like that on the bus as a young girl. There were always bigger, meaner kids around. That certainly didn’t help with any fears/insecurity I had. There was nowhere to hide and nobody to protect me.
I felt insecure about my looks growing up (until my older teen years). I was always taller than everyone else and I didn’t have the “cool” clothes. I remember when the Bass sandals were popular (do you remember these ladies?) and my parents couldn’t afford a pair. My sister bought me my first pair of Levi jeans when I was in the 4th grade. I wore those jeans so much that I had patches on the knees. I think I wore them almost every day (as if people wouldn’t notice with the SAME patches every day). Where was my Mom for cryin’ in the rain? Stuff like that makes a kid feel less-than when surrounded by others who are dressed alike. I’m sure you remember those days.
I don’t know why I didn’t defend myself as a young girl. I was so timid.
If you do struggle with insecurity, what do you believe is the root cause of your insecurity? I believe fear and rejection were the root causes. From the womb, I knew I wasn’t wanted and it grew from there.
Doesn’t insecurity, fear and the like spur from us LOOKING AT OURSELVES AND THINKING ABOUT OURSELVES? If my focus is totally on Jesus then there is no room for ME. Right? I wouldn’t be comparing myself to others. I wouldn’t be concerned about what others think of me, right? Me, me, me! How about YOU, YOU, YOU LORD! Less of ME and MORE OF YOU!
I challenge everyone who reads this to join me in removing the focus off of US and placing it where it belongs ON THE LORD.
I just thought of Peter walking on the water. When he took his eyes off of Jesus, he SANK. He focused on himself and the situation surrounding him.
Matthew 14:30
Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!”
To join in the discussion, please click HERE.
True, true, true, Beth!!!
Take our eyes off Jesus, and we will sink–just like Peter!!
Insecurities, feeling less than we are–most stemming from our past–our past which has been purchased and healed by Jesus HIMSELF!! Amazing, outstanding and overwhelming!!
Thanks for standing firm with my for my kids!!
Beth
Hey Beth…
I love that you wrote the definitions of “insecurity”. That can change your answer when you think of those definitions. I like definition # 3… I might have to do something with that one later.
I love that you made the point that we have to just focus on Jesus and Him only… That is the only way to break free from insecurity.
Blessings Beth!!
I think insecurities are something we all face at some point in our lives. I was the opposite of you….I was always the shortest one in my class. It used to make me an easy target to be picked on. However, over time, I became a stronger person and learned to see myself through God’s eyes. Oh, I still struggle from time to time, but I definitely think I’m headed in the right direction…with God’s help! Thanks for sharing your story, Beth!
Yes, I do remember those Bass sandals…I’ve never had a pair, either!
I knew I wasn’t wanted and it grew from there.
I totally related to this statement.
This is a very interesting post, Beth. Thanks for bringing all this to our attention.
hugs, bj
That’s why we are told to keep our eyes on Him, and He promises to keep us in perfect peace!
Loved the post that was highlighted. I think I remember that from before but am not certain.
Every morning we are to put on our armour and our armour is Christ. We are to put on Him! Taking His word, His power and His strength with us. We take Him with us wherever we go.
Thank you for laying your heart out, bless you.
This seems very insightful.
Blessings – and thanks for sharing.
thanks for all the good words that you are sharing with everybody..god bless you sis
Insecurity is such a heavy battle amongst women especially, I’ve noticed. Praise the Lord, for we can find security in our identity as daughters of the King. We are wanted and adored by our Abba. 🙂
I do believe that, if we as women, knew the incredible love and value that God has for us, we would be less inclined to be self focused and insecure. But even in saying that, I have found myself insecure at times but I do notice it is far less when I keep my eyes rivited on Jesus.
Great post Beth! So good!
Hey Beth, I believe we have all suffered from insecurities in our lives. Even back into the womb as you state here. Some of us were born premature in a time when the child was separated from the mother at birth for a time creating detachment disorders and feelings of neglect later on.
Whenever we feel rejected or unwanted as a child or perhaps lacking in the nurturing touch from a caregiver who loves and accepts us just because we are who we are, the tone has been set for insecurities. Add to that the many traumas of growing up in a cruel and calloused world, not to leave out the many abuses and hurts a person deals with from birth on and insecurity caused by fear and rejection is compounded.
I feel it is important to question the reasons for our insecurities and it is also important to go back at times so the Lord can heal our hearts. We need to sometimes look inward in order to move onward. Fear of rejection is huge for all of us and it is compounded by the many hurts inflicted on us starting in childhood for most.
We serve an amazing and merciful God who wants to heal our hearts. I believe our insecurities are diminished as we begin to understand the heart of the Father. As we grow in our understanding of how he sees us and how much we are loved, we can let go of the insecurities that have been put on us by human beings. There is no healing power that has given me more satisfaction and nurturing than when the Lord gives me a look at myself thought his eyes.
He is so wonderful. Amen?